Wednesday, June 01, 2011

HOLY-

HOLY FUCK. 5 YEARS LATER AND I FINALLY GOT THIS ACCOUNT BACK OMG. I FEEL LIKE CRYING.

due to the fact that my old posts were emo as hell (and at the same time resonant of what i still post about now) and the fact that i finally FINALLY have my blogspot back. O___O

time to clean out the cobwebs.

Thursday, May 04, 2006

para masave

Friday, June 03, 2005

pets galore. pt1

my pet!

Wednesday, June 01, 2005

psycho today, cadaver tomorrow.

it has been a weird week. i'll start off with a little introduction on what happened last sunday. We just left after mass and well of course the same pattern of events happened: i wasn't paying any attention to the priest and other stuff and i didn't even bother to look at my lil sister during the peace be with you part. ok. so everything's a cliche sunday. then it happened. my older sis was to be dropped off at this school near the church. while she was partly outside [get it? one legs on the chair, the car's door's open and her foot is stepping on the ground] i TAPPED my lil sister to move. so she retorted "di pa naman nakalabas si ate ah!". then it broke the promise of having a quiet afternoon at home. my parents went ranting on how i hate my lil sister. my mom said i was mindsetting that hate to make my sister's homelife miserable. so my dad tried talking to me. i wasn't really trying to commune with him. then he tried driving to a point questioning about faith and hatred. so i said: "yeah. i hate her [my lil sister] i got used to thinking that i hate her. i got used to it."

i can't remember the shit i said after that all i know was that i was sobbing uncontrollably and i can't breathe. my dad told me to go outside to drink so i can talk properly. but i said i don't want to. so silence. sob here, sob there. then i was crying and i was laughing. i don't know what my dad was thinking. he even offered a psychologist to me. i said no thanks. it's just a waste of time and money.
so after i got shouted at to go outside to drink since i can't breathe, my dad talked about faith again. he started analyzing me and anakin skywalker. so i go: ???.

it was weird. it was an eye-opener. i think i need a psychologist. or a week or two in an asylum. that will make me feel better, right? or crazier?

~bear out

Wednesday, May 25, 2005

^_^ quiz time b*tches pt2!!!








Brute
You are 28% Rational, 42% Extroverted, 100% Brutal, and 57% Arrogant.
You are the Brute! You are introverted, arrogant, brutal, and more intuitive than rational. Like a big, dumb animal, you are driven by your emotions more than your reason, and as a result of the fact that you care very little for the feelings of others, you tend to be rather selfish. Because of your selfishness, you also tend to be a bit arrogant, seeing yourself as big or strong or smart or always correct. This makes you a stubborn, irrational, emotion-driven brute. King Kong best represents the gorilla-version of your personality. Emotional, introverted (King Kong was isolated on his own island, after all), brutal, and arrogant (proud to be the largest ape on Earth!), Kong would probably get along very well with you, seeing as how you share many of the same traits. Aside from, you know, all the fur. So your personality defect is simply that you resemble King Kong to a very high degree. Which probably isn't a good thing, you big brute!


To put it less negatively:

1. You are more INTUITIVE than rational.

2. You are more INTROVERTED than extroverted.

3. You are more BRUTAL than gentle.

4. You are more ARROGANT than humble.

Compatibility:

Your exact opposite is the Hand-Raiser.

Other personalities you would probably get along with are the Class Clown, the Schoolyard Bully, and the Sociopath.

*

*

If you scored near fifty percent for a certain trait (42%-58%), you could very well go either way. For example, someone with 42% Extroversion is slightly leaning towards being an introvert, but is close enough to being an extrovert to be classified that way as well. Below is a list of the other personality types so that you can determine which other possible categories you may fill if you scored near fifty percent for certain traits.

The other personality types:

The Emo Kid: Intuitive, Introverted, Gentle, Humble.

The Starving Artist: Intuitive, Introverted, Gentle, Arrogant.

The Bitch-Slap: Intuitive, Introverted, Brutal, Humble.

The Brute: Intuitive, Introverted, Brutal, Arrogant.

The Hippie: Intuitive, Extroverted, Gentle, Humble.

The Televangelist: Intuitive, Extroverted, Gentle, Arrogant.

The Schoolyard Bully: Intuitive, Extroverted, Brutal, Humble.

The Class Clown: Intuitive, Extroverted, Brutal, Arrogant.

The Robot: Rational, Introverted, Gentle, Humble.

The Haughty Intellectual: Rational, Introverted, Gentle, Arrogant.

The Spiteful Loner: Rational, Introverted, Brutal, Humble.

The Sociopath: Rational, Introverted, Brutal, Arrogant.

The Hand-Raiser: Rational, Extroverted, Gentle, Humble.

The Braggart: Rational, Extroverted, Gentle, Arrogant.

The Capitalist Pig: Rational, Extroverted, Brutal, Humble.

The Smartass: Rational, Extroverted, Brutal, Arrogant.








My test tracked 4 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender:



















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You scored higher than 12% on Rationality





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You scored higher than 43% on Extroversion





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You scored higher than 99% on Brutality





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You scored higher than 66% on Arrogance
Link: The Personality Defect Test written by saint_gasoline on OkCupid Free Online Dating

Tuesday, May 24, 2005

^_^ quiz time b*tches!

What Icons are for you? by ladyallie
Username
Favourite Colour
Sex
Your Love icon is...
Your Sad Icon is...
Your Happy Icon is...
Your Angry Icon is...
Your Food Icon is...
Your Animal Icon is...
Your Random Icon is...
Your Cartoon Icon is...
Your Sexy Icon is...
Quiz created with MemeGen!

Monday, May 16, 2005

fruits of not doing what's supposed to be done.

ah fuck. i've been talking to myself lately. hmm. you know what i've been stopping myself from slashing myself and you know what holds me back? the word idiocy. hahaha. i am sooo dumb. i kept thinking: "yeah i hate -----. ----- pisses me off. and now ---- is blaming me for this shit. ah fuck i'm gonna bust up ---- face real soon. make ---- see that ----- is way too over her head. that she's wrong." and then i go: "ah shit. i can't do that. respect that's what they want me to do. but hell, do they care. fine. i'm wrong. i'll not do it. i keep it. i harbor these thoughts. i'll be a good girl. i won't do it. i'll be nuetral. keep my cool. but still mad."

shit. why am i like this? heck i feel like an idiot right now. but if i cut i feel like an idiot again. i try to ------- but that won't work so i resort to -----. too shitty. that's what i am really feeling now. waaay too fucked up.

pfft. i really wish someone would actually approach me and pull me out of the dirthole i'm making myself. i try to hide and stop these shitty things. but of course i can't. i'm just here. here and waiting. here and rotting in this mudpile. i won't tell. i'm always scared. i'm crumbling down and nobody knows. heck. forgive me for my pleas. my requests for attention. my unsatisfied thirst to belong. whatever. i already belong. but i want to be different. so forgive me. bear out~